


Not Like This

by amandapanda425



Category: Charmed (TV 2018)
Genre: Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:40:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25871506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amandapanda425/pseuds/amandapanda425
Summary: Prompt #12: You're drunk.Set after 2x08. Macy was just hoping to black out. Maybe that would take away the image of stupid Harry with his stupid tongue down stupid Abigael’s throat.
Relationships: Harry Greenwood/Macy Vaughn
Comments: 12
Kudos: 30





	Not Like This

**Author's Note:**

> This is probably the angstiest thing I have ever written. Please leave a comment if you liked it!

Mel heard the front door slam shut, followed by the sound of feet stomping to the kitchen. Mel went to investigate and found Macy in the kitchen, pulling a bottle of tequila out of the refrigerator and grabbing a shot glass from the cabinet.

“Whoa. What happened?” Mel asked, trying to figure out what had happened between the time Macy left the house to go find Harry at the Command Center and now.

“Nope. Not ready to talk about it,” Macy said, downing two tequila shots in rapid succession. “How’s Maggie doing?”

“Angry. Confused. Broken-hearted,” Mel said. “My question now is how are you doing?”

“Oh you know, angry. Confused. Broken-hearted,” Macy replied. “Emphasis on the angry at the moment.”

“Macy, what’s wrong?” Mel asked, putting her hand on Macy’s arm. “What happened at the Command Center? Where is Harry?”

At the mention of Harry’s name, Macy burst into tears and quickly tried to regain her composure. “It’s nothing. It’s stupid. Honestly, I’ll be fine. Please, go keep Maggie company. I really just need to be alone with Mr. Cuervo here tonight,” Macy said, sniffling and wiping her eyes. “Promise. I’ll tell you all about it tomorrow, but tonight, I just need to be alone.”

Mel eyed Macy reluctantly. “Okay, well, if you’re sure. Just slow down on those shots and grab a chaser or something. I really don’t like the idea of leaving you alone down here.”

“It’s okay. I’m okay. I will be okay,” Macy said. “Promise. Just. Give me tonight.”

Mel got up and poured Macy a glass of water. “Alright, just drink some water before you get completely shitfaced? I’ll be upstairs if you need me.”

“Will do.” Macy said, drinking her water as she poured a third shot of tequila. 

Mel reluctantly left the room as she saw Macy’s eyes start to well up again. Mel had no idea what happened, but she anticipated having to kick her Whitelighter’s ass tomorrow. Something was clearly wrong. 

Macy sat in the dark kitchen by herself. After her fifth shot, she got up to get something to cut the tequila. Mel was right. She needed to slow down. One more shot and she would be past the point where she was going to say things she would regret. She poured a glass of orange juice and put in the equivalent of another four shots. At this point, Macy was just hoping to black out. Maybe that would take away the image of stupid Harry with his stupid tongue down stupid Abigael’s throat. She sat back down and sipped the drink. She squeezed her eyes shut more tightly and put her fingers against her temples. When she opened them, Harry was standing in front of her.

“Macy, why are you sitting in the dark with a bottle of tequila?” Harry asked. His hair was still tousled and his lips slightly swollen.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Macy asked, her words slurring together.

“I came to check on Maggie. What is your problem?” Harry asked, genuinely confused.

“I don’t have a problem. I just figured you’d be buried inside Abigael and the Susans by now,” Macy said, staring Harry directly in the eye. “I know you said you weren’t stupid enough to do that, but maybe I don’t know you as well as I thought I did.” Macy tossed back a large gulp of her drink.

“And if I were, what business is that of yours?” Harry asked.

“What business is it of mine? Harry, she tried to fucking kill us,” Macy said, standing up and moving closer to the Whitelighter. She held her glass in her hand, the liquid sloshing close to the rim. “Forgive me if I thought your job was to protect us. Or were you protecting us when your tongue was halfway down her throat?” Macy asked, jabbing Harry in the chest with her finger. Harry’s eyes widened and his face went slightly pale. “Yeah, didn’t think I’d see that, did you? Well, I did.” Macy said, taking another large sip and then moving over to the counter to pour more tequila in the glass.

“You know what, Macy. I sacrifice everything for you and your sisters. For more than sixty years, my only job has been to sacrifice myself to protect witches. And I do it without hesitation because it is my calling. So, I’m sorry if for one goddamn night, I just wanted to feel like a man again,” Harry said, moving to stand next to Macy at the counter.

“Oh, you wanted to feel like a man? How can you be so blind? Harry, she’s using you,” Macy responded.

“Have you ever considered that I’m using her? I know her intentions aren’t sincere. I’m under no illusion that she wants to fall in love and live happily ever after,” Harry said, his voice getting louder. “But at least she wants me. At least she sees me as someone to be desired. And besides, what was it you said? Danger can be exciting? Was it the danger that has you so attracted to my Darklighter?”

“What are you talking about?” Macy asked, evading Harry’s look.

“I know about your feelings for Jimmy. I know you found him ‘disgusting,’ but ‘strangely intriguing,” Harry said, parroting back the exact words she had said to Mel earlier today. “See, I can hear things you probably didn’t want heard, too. I was coming back to help the two of you with the curse when I heard you emphatically telling Mel you could never be attracted to me because it would be too ‘weird.’” 

“Harry, I --” Macy said. “I don’t know what to say.”

“Do you have any idea how much it hurts? I could bear it if you were attracted to someone else. But to know you want someone that is all the worst parts of me. That is fucking identical to me in image. But at the end of the day, you still don’t want me.” Harry said, his voice breaking at the end. “So yeah, I kissed Abigael. Because it felt nice for someone to see me as Harry, a man to be desired, rather than just Harry, the neutered aide.” 

“Harry, I don’t know what I want. I don’t know if I wanted your Darklighter because he looked like you or because of some attraction to his darkness,” Macy said, moving closer to Harry until she was standing chest to chest with him. “But all I know is when I saw you with Abigael, I just wanted it to be me you were kissing.”

Macy put her hand on Harry’s cheek and leaned in. Her lips touched his and she hesitated for just a second. She felt Harry gasp against her and slightly open his lips. Macy took that as an opening and thrust her tongue into his mouth. She pulled herself closer to him as their tongues battled for dominance. Harry pushed her against the edge of the counter and started to devour her. Macy broke the kiss and started to kiss down the side of his neck. She pulled his shirt from his pants and reached for his belt buckle. Instantly, Harry pushed back from her.

“No, Macy, stop. You’re drunk. You’re confused. I can’t do this unless you are absolutely certain this is what you want. I couldn’t bear it if you decided in the morning this was nothing more than a drunken mistake,” Harry said, looking at the floor.

“But Harry, I thought this was what you wanted. I thought you wanted me,” Macy said, her head tilting to the side. She moved closer to him and tried to pull him back against her body. 

“I want you more than anything I have ever wanted in my life. But not like this. Not after you’ve had what seems to be half a bottle of tequila. Not when you’re angry about Abigael. I want all of you. And if you can’t give me all of you, then I have to accept I can’t have any of you.” Harry said, saying the last bit as a whisper directly in her ear. Harry let his lips rest against Macy’s cheek for just a moment before he stepped back to orb out of the house. 

Macy looked at the spot where Harry was just standing. She sunk to the floor, her sobs wracking her body.


End file.
